Where's the Beef?
by Brand
Summary: Iori goes food shopping, silliness ensues.


________________________________________________________________________  
WHERE'S THE BEEF??  
-A trip to the super market.  
-King of Fighters, Iori  
-Be warned much silliness ensues.  
-By: Brandi  
-e-mail: brand@popanime.net  
-Any feedback is great!  
________________________________________________________________________  
  
Iori was running extremely low on food, his fridge was like one of those   
commercials of starving kids in Africa. So Iori did what all brave men   
do, he went food shopping.  
* * *  
  
The day started had out like any other. Iori got up and dressed and   
groomed himself. He went to feed his cat, his only companion, Hunter,   
when he noticed there was only one can of cat food left. He feed Hunter  
and then went to feed him self when he noticed the only thing life   
in the fridge was the mysterious yellow box of white stuff.  
  
Iori thought to himself, "What is that?, How did it get there?, And is   
it editable?"  
  
So being the brave man he was he pulled the yellow box out of the fridge   
and poured some of the powdery white stuff in his hand. Iori stared at   
it in wonder for a moment and then gulped it down, and as fast it had   
gone down it came back into the sink.  
  
A hacking sound poured out of his mouth right afterwards.  
  
"That was absolutely disgusting!," he thought, "What is it?"  
  
Iori looked at the box and it read Baking Soda.  
  
"What is an open box of baking soda doing in the fridge?" he thought   
as placed the box back and was making a mental note as not to do that   
again.  
  
"I must go food shopping or I shall starve."  
  
So Iori got out pen and paper to write down what he needed to buy.  
  
"Lets see, I need cat food, meat as in steak, ribs, lamb, nah no lamb   
I heard its tough, and a few other items," he thought as he wrote down   
his food shopping list.  
  
***  
  
Iori drove up to the local food store (Kingsfood, King of Food Stores).   
He got out of his car and strolled on up to the food store and grabbed a   
shopping cart. Iori walked into the food store and headed straight down   
to the meat department.  
  
"MMMMMMMMMMM MEAT!," he thought, "Need lots of meat, my favorite food."  
  
Iori packed his cart full of meats, steaks, ham, ribs, and other odds and   
ends. Iori began to stroll away when he ran in to Mai Shiranui.   
  
"Oh no," was his only thought.  
  
"Oh my, Iori that's a lot of meat you have!," she said, "Are you having   
a party?"  
  
"No, this is my normal food shopping" he said in reply.  
  
"Oh, Well you know eating all that red meat isn't good for you, you will   
die young from it"  
  
Iori gave Mai a nastier look then 3 day old road kill. Crap was the only   
thing Mai could think of, Iori is going to die young any why from his   
Orochi blood.  
  
"Oh!, I am so sorry Iori. I didn't mean any thing by it!"   
  
"Oh!, well, Iori said rather smugly."  
  
"Uh, OK Iori I'll see to you later, said Mai as she scampered away."  
  
Iori strolled away to look for what else he needed. He headed towards   
the produce department to get the next item on his list, parsley.   
When he heard.....   
  
"Hey Iori"  
  
"Oh no not someone else, why won't they leave me alone?," thought Iori.  
  
When he ran into King.   
  
"Jeez Iori that's a heck of a whole lot of meat you have there!" Said   
King, "Are you having a dinner party?"  
  
"No, but that's a hell of a whole lot of olives you have King, having   
Italian?" said Iori in reply.  
  
"Nope, Its you just can't have a good martini without an olive, you   
know?, said King as she walked away."  
  
Iori found the parsley when he noticed Terry Bogard, he tried as hard   
as he might to blend in and not be seen, by putting parsley in front   
of his face. He really didn't want to talk to any one else. He was   
relieved when he heard Chin Gentsai yelling about how Terry always gets   
to all the beer before he does. Iori quickly walked away and down   
another isle. Which happened to be the pet-care and toys isle. Iori   
grabbed some cat food and headed down isle when he saw Ralf & Clark   
arguing over some Power Rangers toys.  
  
"That Green Ranger is mine!," said Ralf.  
  
"No, I found it first!," said Clark.  
  
Iori laughed to him self, he was no longer paying attention he almost   
ran into Goro.  
  
"Iori!," said a surprised Goro, "My that's a lot of meat!"  
  
"Yeah, I know that one already," said Iori, " What is up with the doll?"  
  
"Its Sailor Mars, that Rei, she seems like a nice girl."  
  
"Oh, really?," said Iori, a little scaried, as he walked down into another   
isle.  
  
Behold the next Isle was hair and higene isle. Iori checked his list   
again, ahh deordent. He walk up to the hair gel, decided he need some   
of that too. Iori accidentally bumped the cart next to him. He looked   
down at the cart when he hit and noticed bananas, cucumbers, zuicine, and   
a few large packs of condoms.  
  
"What in the world?"  
  
Iori looked up to see Benimaru.  
  
"Iori, what are you doing here?," said Beni.  
  
"Guess."  
  
"Food shopping?"  
  
"Ding...Ding... Ding, you get a whole point"  
  
"Oh well, hate to get hair gel and run but I really got to go, talk to   
you later Iori," Beni said as he winked at Iori and walked away.  
  
"Talk to you later, yeah right!." Thought Iori.  
  
Next but not least Iori ran in to (away its kinda the other way around)   
Andy.  
  
"Ahhhh, see didn't see you there, Oh hey Iori!, Oh I better get going Mai   
went up in the line but forgot maxipads."  
  
Iori laughed to himself.  
  
"Next I need deodorant," thought Iori as he walk up to the deodorant.  
  
"Lets see, something strong, I don't want to look sweaty and smell bad for   
the tournament," he thought as he picked out the best choice in deodorant.   
Iori checked his list one list time.  
  
"Ahhh, cigarettes"  
  
He walked toward the ciggerate stand when two twin boys ran into him.   
Iori gave them a nasty look and they ran away.  
  
"Iori trying to scare my sons?"  
  
"Huh?, Kim Kapwan?," a slightly confused Iori said as he grabbed his   
cigarettes.  
  
"Hey Iori you'll die young if you smoke all them cigarettes" said Kim.  
  
"Yeah I know"  
  
"Daddy, daddy we want coloring books," said Kim's twin sons in unison,   
while pulling on his legs.  
  
"Oh, yes what we came here for, talk to you later Iori."  
  
Iori was getting really annoyed so he decided to check out his order.   
He walked up the the check out places his items on the conveyer belt.   
The girl began to check out his order but for some reason she was taking   
forever and then there was that beeping.  
  
"Argh, that beeping driving me nuts. I can't wait to go home and sit   
and get away from every one"  
  
* * *  
Iori was was opening his door when he heard......  
  
"Surprise, Happy Birthday Iori!," from everyone.  
  
"Ohhhh, Please make the hurting stop!!!" was the only thing on Iori's   
mind now.  
  
  
End 


End file.
